Student ministry is often where rules about minors break down in the church. Student ministries don’t need fewer rules than children’s ministries. They need different rules. Though rebellion seems to be a rite of passage for many teenagers, they are far more receptive to guidance than you might think. Young people need leaders to shoot straight with them. About life. With biblical depth. We don’t need to wade in the shallows and soft peddle the Christian faith. Instead, we must shepherd our youth through the depths of Scripture and the valleys of life. Be clear and honest with them.
One sure way to confuse the younger generation is to set expectations and then not hold anyone accountable. A lack of transparency from adults is frustrating to teenagers. The younger generation tends to follow leaders who are transparent rather than distant or detached. And they want to know they’re not alone in their struggles. Consider the following best practices for building better student safety systems in our churches.
1. Never alone applies to teens as well.
As in children’s ministry, leaders, staff members, and volunteers should always have a third party present when meeting with a student. This rule applies to vehicle rides as well. If a situation requires one-on-one counseling, meet in a room with a camera, leave the door slightly ajar, and make sure another responsible adult is nearby. There may be times when you end up alone with a student unintentionally. For example, parents might be late picking up their teen, and you’re the only one available to stay until they arrive. In such a case, contact the parents and inform them of the situation. If the parents are unavailable, contact another church leader.
2. Report any reasonable suspicion of abuse.
Take all accusations seriously. The process for reporting abuse with teens is the same as with children. Do not delay, and do not conduct an internal investigation before calling the proper authorities. Each state has different guidelines on mandatory reporting. It is good to know these guidelines, but every adult leader in the student ministry must take personal responsibility for reporting any known or suspected abuse.
3. Document all major problems and incidents.
I hope you won’t have to deal with biting incidents or uncontrolled tantrums in your student ministry, as you might with younger children. But you should document any instances of bullying, injuries that occur on the church campus, and dangerous behavior exhibited by students. Parents and guardians should receive a copy of these reports, and leaders in the student ministry should use these situations to take corrective measures.
4. Offer professional counseling to those who can’t afford it.
Unfortunately, you may encounter problems among young people that require professional guidance. Every church should have a benevolence fund to get people started with a counselor. Even if you are able to pay for only a couple of sessions, this gesture will go a long way in demonstrating a high level of care for individuals experiencing abuse or trauma.
5. Never promise confidentiality.
If a student approaches you and asks for your help but doesn’t want anyone else to know, you should never promise confidentiality. You should also quickly correct other adults who tell students they are “a safe place” and will not share their secrets with others. Such behavior is inappropriate and could possibly indicate that someone doesn’t have the young person’s best interests in mind. Many states have legal prohibitions against this kind of confidentiality. More critically, secrecy is often how spiritual abuse—and other types of abuse—begins.
6. Limit off-hours time with students.
Unhealthy relationships can form when an adult spends too much time with students outside of normal ministry. These bonds can begin innocently but grow quickly due to the emotional attachments young people make. Some teens will request extra time with you. While occasionally hanging out with a group of teens is usually harmless, be cautious of the amount of time you spend with any one individual, even if it’s in group settings. Be doubly aware of any tendency on your part or the student’s to focus too much on your personal relationship.
7. Provide clear and written accountability guidelines for all leaders.
A one-page checklist is an excellent way to remind volunteers of their responsibilities in student ministry. If you’re the leader, create a bullet point checklist for all leaders to have in their possession. Use ongoing training sessions to review the checklist and remind everyone of the accountability systems in place. When these guidelines are violated, deal with the responsible person immediately.
8. Avoid excessive texting and social media interaction with students.
In many cases, students will need your cell phone number. There are also good reasons why you may be connected on social media. But remember, you are in their lives to equip them spiritually, not to be the cool friend they send silly messages to late at night. Be the adult in your relationships with students. Even when you are connected digitally, maintain a proper rapport. Here is a good rule of thumb: Any message you send to a student should be appropriate for anyone else in the church to view. When you type a message, imagine your words projected on the screen in a worship service for all to see.
9. Zero tolerance for pornography.
Unfortunately, pornography is ubiquitous, easily accessible, and largely tolerated by our culture. If I could pick one thing to eradicate from this planet, it would be pornography. Thirty years ago, when I was coming of age, pornography was limited in supply and difficult for a young teenager to obtain. Today, all it takes is a little curiosity and an online search to plaster the screen full of inappropriate images. Why is porn so harmful, especially to young people? In the brain of an adolescent, the emotional center develops faster than its ability to control impulses, and this disparity demonstrates why teens lack the needed maturity to suppress sexual cravings elicited by pornographic content.
When you encounter a teen viewing pornography, you should inform the parents and document the activity in an incident report if it occurred on the church campus or at a church-sanctioned event. Of particular concern are the cases of teens sending each other sexually explicit images of themselves. In many states, “sexting” is illegal for anyone under eighteen, and the images could be considered child pornography, even if sent between two consenting minors. Any possession of such images by anyone—underage minor or adult—should be reported to the proper authorities. Additionally, the church should seek legal counsel to understand the best next steps.
10. Use the six-month rule for potential volunteers.
You should implement a six-month waiting period for anyone wanting to serve in areas of the church with minors. People who intend to harm will seek out organizations and churches with lax standards, especially churches desperate for volunteers. No amount of desperation should cause a church to sacrifice safety.
Students are more exposed to potential harm than ever before, and they are less equipped than ever to deal with this exposure. The church should be a place of safety for young people to learn how to cope with the inevitable difficulties of life.
Check out Safe Church Training: A first-of-its-kind, comprehensive safe church training resource to equip your ministries to be a safe environment for children, students, and anyone who attends your church.
Posted on January 26, 2026
As President of Church Answers, Sam Rainer wears many hats. From podcast co-host to full-time Pastor at West Bradenton Baptist Church, Sam’s heart for ministry and revitalization are evident in all he does.
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